This week’s art features a girl with her head open and poppies floating in or out. I drew this just before I visited my doctor, around beginning of 2019. I feel like I have been visiting my doctor(s) a lot. I have such a weak immune system so I easily get sick, and when I do get sick, it usually gets complicated because it turns into the worse kind of sick. But this evening, I visited because there was something wrong with my left ear. For a couple of days, I was experiencing something very weird with my ear. It feels as if it was being pulled and then it goes numb. Then, it began making popping noises, or actually, static-y noises that disturbed me because it was so abrupt and loud.
I mentioned these symptoms to my doctor and said something along the lines of, “it feels like it’s all in my head. But it’s real. I can’t explain it.” My doctor, I think he was interested in giving me an existential crisis on top of my weird ear experience, said, “Life is all in your head.”
I liked what he said so much that I decided to title this piece with the phrase. I thought it was fitting, you see. Among the meanings poppies symbolize include: a lively imagination, death, peace, messages delivered in dreams, and restful sleep or recovery.
When I was drawing “Life is all in your head,” I was in a mindset of feeling unbound. I was irritated with the fact that I get so easily sick and how much I would like good thoughts to come in and kick bad thoughts out.
Anyway, it turned out I had a Eustachian Tube Dysfunction, which I predicted I did have (thanks to WebMD). After frightening myself about hearing loss due to some tests done, I cried, was given medicine and learned a thing or two about congestion. The cause of the ETD was a bronchitis I had about a month before, it turns out I was still congested from it. It did not help that my allergies were kicking up around this time.
While I am writing this, I am sending pleas to the universe to help my well-being. I would like to be healthy overall, it would be nice to have a break. Other than that, I guess I just have to remember that life is all in my head and let go.
What are some ways you cope when you’re feeling unwell?
Thank you for reading! Don’t forget to check my Instagram where I am more active through Stories, etc 🙂 My Instagram is @jessicamendozaart !